Jag bara älskar den XD
The ticket inspector
The passenger is sitting in a compartment on a train. He is reading a newspaper. The steward opens the door.
(The passenger closes the door, and continues reading. The waiter opens the door.)
Waiter: Seats for dinner!
(The passenger closes the door again, and continues reading. The ticket inspector opens the door.)
Passenger: I don't want a ticket, thank you.
Inspector: I'm not selling tickets, sir.
Inspector: No, I want to see your ticket.
Passenger: Oh, I haven't got a ticket.
Inspector: You haven't got a ticket?
Passenger: No. I never buy a ticket.
Passenger: Well, they are very expensive, you know.
Inspector: Sir, you're travelling on a train. When people travel on a train, they always buy a ticket.
Inspector: And this is a first-class compartment.
Passenger: Yes, it is very nice, isn't it?
Inspector: No, sir. I mean: This is a firstclass compartment. When people travel in a first-class compartment, they always buy a first-class ticket.
(They look at each other for a moment.)
Passenger: No, they don't.
Passenger: A lot of people don't buy tickets. The Queen doesn't buy a ticket, does she' Eh? Eh?
Inspector: No, sir, but she's a famous person.
Passenger: And what about you? Where's yours?
Passenger: Yes, yours. Your ticket. Have you got a ticket?
Inspector: No, I haven't got a ticket.
Passenger: Ooh, are you a famous person?
Inspector: (Flattered) Famous? Well, not very (Back to normal) Sir, I am a ticket inspector. I inspect tickets. Are you going to show me your ticket?
Passenger: No, I haven't got a ticket.
(The ticket inspector puts his hand into his pocket.)
Passenger: 'What are you going to do?
Inspector: I'm going to write your name in my book.
Inspector: What is your name, sir?
(The inspector begins to write.)
Passenger: Mouse. M-O-U-S-E.
(The inspector stops writing.)
Inspector: Your name, sir?
Passenger: Karl Marx? William Shakespeare? Charles Dickens?
Inspector: I see, sir. Well, if you're not going to tell me your name, please leave the train.
Inspector: Leave the train.
Inspector: You can't what?
Passenger: I can't leave the train.
Inspector: Not now, sir. At the next station.
Inspector: It's in the book, sir. When you travel by train, you buy a tick- et, and if you don't buy a ticket, you
Passenger-Inspector: leave the train.
Inspector: Here we are, sir. We're coming to a station. Please leave the train now.
Inspector: Yes, sir. I'm sorry, but
Passenger: Oh, that's OK.
Inspector: it's in the book, and what did you say?
Passenger: I said: That's OK.'
Passenger: Yes, this is my station. Goodbye.
(The passenger leaves the train.)